The Human Behind the Work

If you are fortunate enough to have a job, or even as lucky to have a career or long term commitment with your employer, then this post is for you.  

I have been with my company for over 8 years.  I didn't set out to have this career, rather nepotism and a winning personality landed me here.  I kid of course; but really I am very lucky to have this opportunity.  I am also fortunate enough to enjoy most of the work that I do; that is, the actual tasks, not the industry really, or the daily politics that is office life.  I like to think I'm good at what I do and that my work is valuable.  Yet, after 8 bumpy years I find myself staring out the window that is potentially a life long path of more of the same.  As some of my other writings might indicate, I suffer from depression from time to time and the whole daily grind of dragging oneself out of bed to sit in an office box finds me panicky and unable to find motivation.  Despite many attempts at reforming the work world (i.e., ROWE - results oriented work environment) I believe there is still this element of presenteeism that you cannot escape.  

I have believed that at times I could rule the world from my bed in my jammies.  If you've seen the first Sex and the City movie, you'll remember Samantha and Miranda negotiating Carrie's apt. buyback and personal business dealings from a cell phone, in a bathing suit, from a Mexican beach resort.  It's true.  You probably could rule the world from the comfort of wherever you want to be.  Regardless of my personal bedtime accomplishments, I find myself facing the old presentee predicament.  Rather, it's a predicament of my soul.  

I had a boss once that was tough, genuinely sweet and caring, and someone who would fight for you if you worked hard.  She was only beginning to mentor me and help me find a path to a promotion, when the office politics got the best of her.  She and the company parted ways after 27 years of service.  I only realized after she was gone, how much I needed her.  

As winter is fast approaching, I find myself deep in a funk that begs me to question every single moment of life.  I think we all have negative voices that we battle, but I am so often mired by the self sabotage that I don't realize how abusive I am to myself.  This morning a truly horrifying inner voice shook me up.  What the hell am I saying to myself??  This is the sort of thing a deeply disturbed alcoholic and violently abusive husband would say to his wife in a Lifetime movie.  I really have to be nicer to myself.  No wonder I'm depressed.  

Looking for a soft shoulder in my mind, I remembered my old boss.  She wasn't the smartest person in the room, and frankly; she was very technically challenged, which is weird in a tech heavy department.  How did she get so far if she seemingly had no skills?  She was genuinely nice to people.  After all, the work comes from human beings.  There are people behind all of the mundane tasks.  There are families, lives, feelings and struggles behind every desk.  At the end of the day, little tasks and projects will eventually get done, but they won't, if you as an employee are feeling like a robot.  We cannot thrive this way and work in our little boxes like mechanical creatures.  At the root of presenteeism, is the human face.  Kindness and understanding that this other human being needs something from you so they can do something for someone else, because we're all just struggling in this life day by day is easily a forgotten element of the work life.  

And just like that, I think I can feel human again.  It's these other people that we sometimes forget we need to help keep us grounded in our daily grind.  

This Thanksgiving season, I am so thankful for the kind generosity my old boss gave me.  She is a great example of how we can all be great employees, nay, humans, through empathy.  Although some people can be devious, manipulative and difficult to work with, every one of us has our own personal back story, and it takes a greater strength to bear that in mind than to join in the ranks of politicking and power play.  As long as I can empathize with the lovely souls I've shared 8 great years with, I think I can keep going for maybe another decade or so.  Here's hoping I'm that lucky.