Onion Layers

Sometimes, when we are reeling from chaos back there, setting a bunch of new goals and disciplines are a completely scoffable idea.  2014 basically ripped me a new asshole, and I'm willing to bet I am not the only one.  I sense better times are ahead, but not without really absorbing whatever we were meant to learn in the last 12 months.  If you didn't learn something from those trials, then I think the next few months may not seem that much better.  I for one, am determined to really embrace the skin flaying pain I've endured as a definite mental notice to take heed; repeats will occur if you don't.

As I broach 35, it's sobering to realize you're no longer finding yourself,  you're defining yourself.  Keep It Moving is generally my motto when I feel stuck in an emotional circle I can't seem to shake.  The tough keep moving.  It certainly seemed to work for FDR.  I've had ample time to feel the feels and now I need to pick up some gas. Pushing through an emotional balloon that seems to have sucked you into it's distorted view, is just as pleasant as sticking yourself with a needle.  Yet it must be done.  Adapt or die.  Kiss whatever good thing you thought you had back there with sweet sorrow and keep it the fuck moving.  I realized the other day, I started 2014 with the song "Break My Stride"; and quite fitting, I embrace that mantra more than ever.  Only this year, it's less about not letting anyone break my stride, and instead, not letting anyone hold me down...again.

I will press on, continue to shed my deep onion layers, rustle those dust bunnies in the corners of my soul and shine that mirror further in.  For we are but vessels - open caverns to expel the gifts we are given.

Le Chiem.  To life.  Cheers, and Happy New Year.